Comfort – the silent killer

Now I know single ladies and men want to feel that “comfort level” with people they are seeing.  They kind of judge how far they are into a relationship based on how comfortable they feel around their partner.  This is great, like you don’t want to feel on edge and afraid of doing something that might scare them off.  HOWEVER, this is also a bad thing.  There is nothing worse than being with a guy or girl that has let themselves go.

You also want your partner that you are dating to see you in the best light.  Ya, joking around and letting your personality come through is important but you know what’s not, not showering.  It may start as something like, “we’re just staying in tonight” or “I don’t have time, I’ll just throw my hair in a ponytail”.  Harmless right?  Not really.  This is the start.  Now, I’m not some uptight prick that wants my girls to need to put on a runway show for me but if I start to see a pattern of you letting yourself go, I get nervous.


And single ladies, it’s not just me.  For those guys that just start dating you and you’re eating salads, working out, taking care of yourself and then a month or so later see you in sweats everyday and scarfing cheeseburgers down your yap, are going to get real scared.  In their mind they think that if you’re acting like this now, what will happen a couple years down the road.

I’m not being a pig.  The coin is the same on the other side.  Guys face it too.  If you stop shaving and showering and are playing videos every night and only doing free dating activities, she’s going to get fed up.

You can avoid this relationship killer if you just let yourself get comfortable but not content.  Don’t settle for “good enough” when it comes to your partner.  You should always want to strive to make them happy because it should make you happy to see them being proud to be with you.  Surprise them with little gifts.  Take that extra five minutes to put on mascara or cologne.  Go to new dating sites instead of the same old burger joint.

Couples don’t have to do this all the time because movie night in with your pj’s and popcorn is fun too.  Just make sure you don’t fall into a routine of just doing the usual.  If you’re relationship hits that point prepare for your partner to move onto someone who will put in the effort.